Tag Archives: diet

Jun1

Breakthrough

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When Breakthrough Breaks Down

So what happens when you go public with three habits that have consistently beaten you for years?  I can answer that question.  In fact I’m an expert on the answer to that question.

First comes a surge of success shored up with determination and resolve.  BIG progress is made.  You are filled with pride and one burning question.  Why didn’t I do this sooner?  It is so easy once you simply commit yourself.  Why didn’t I make this public sooner?  I will inspire everyone.  I am Super Woman!  Watch me soar!  I will be a role model for the world.  Everyone will see that I can do this.  Then they will conquer all their bad habits and overcome all their fears.

It takes a few months for the backward spiral to begin to eat away at your best intentions. Then comes lots of  self recriminations followed by a pretty large dose of self loathing.  It is all wrapped untidily in doubt  and topped with a big bow of guilt.  You scramble to hang in there.  Your fingernails are ripping as you try hard to hang on.  This is no longer just a personal failure.  I HAVE FAILED THE ENTIRE WORLD.

Oh how I wish IHKMBMS.  I’m at that age when it is difficult to keep all the texting acronyms straight.  And let’s be honest, I just made that one up.  So in fairness I will let you in on what it stands for.  “Oh I  wish I had kept my big mouth shut.”  Perhaps now I will.  Maybe that is the big lesson in this whole venture.  Right now I doubt if I can even keep that resolution…the one about keeping my big mouth shut, I mean.  But I’m gonna try.  These days that is all I can promise.

May2

Breakthrough: Change Something

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Change Something

After my public humiliation of admitting on my blog post that I had gained weight this month, I’ve been trying to think/act in a new way.  What is there to learn about weight, dieting, exercise, blah, blah, de-blah, blah, blah, that I don’t already know?

Almost nothing.  So sad, but true.  I admitted at the onset of this battle that I believe the lion’s share of my struggle is mental.  I know what to eat or not eat.  I know to exercise.  But I fall off the food wagon like a drunken pumpkin when it comes to staying the course for a long ride. BUT I have to just keep trying to beat this.  I refuse to throw in the towel and let it beat me again.

Swallowing Pride

So as I worked out this morning I stewed about it.  My local Curves owner, Mindy, is someone I admire for lots of reasons.  She is upbeat every morning.  The way she leads her Zumba class, I think she has some kind of an extra hinge in her mid section or something. Maybe her pelvic bone is double jointed. Is that possible?  Her gym shoes and socks always coordinate with her clothes.  (I work out in a black man’s t-shirt every day).

Those are all impressive qualities, but they aren’t the BIG reasons I admire her.  I heard from someone else (not her) that she has lost 100 pounds.  She has two sons in college so she isn’t a twenty-something-lost-weight-once-expert.  Even more a mystery to me, she lost this significant weight in stages.  She would lose 20 – 30 pounds and then maintain it for quite a while.  Then she would decide to tackle another 20.  It took her maybe a decade, but she did it a chunk at a time.  Maintaining is the big mystery word to me.  I can gain.  Wow, can I gain.  I can lose.  Honestly, I can lose.  I find it easier to eat nothing than to eat reasonably.

 But I am the original yo-yo mama when it comes to the scales.

 This morning I waited until she was alone and asked her how in the world she was able to maintain her weight on the way down, as she plateaued several times.  I confessed my inability to maintain.  We talked for maybe ten minutes.  She gave me several nuggets to take away.  I needed her encouragement and conversation today.  Was it anything earth shatteringly new?  Probably not.  But each time someone tells us something, we are capable of hearing it in a different way.  Here are some of the things she said.

  • Each time she determined to lose her next hunk of weight she had to try something new.  One time she lost weight with those old Jane Fonda videos.
  • She asked if I was drinking lots of water.  I admitted I had done that back in January and February, but gradually had stopped doing that routinely.
  • She suggested this week my goal would be to start drinking the water again.  I’ve started that today.
  • She said try to add in one change per week.
  • Next week keep drinking the water, and work out on the machines differently.  She suggested how to do that.
  • Maybe the following week add in a walk each day…even if it is for only 10 minutes.
  • She restated, “Just change something.”  Every time she dieted and exercised herself down another 20 pounds she did it a little bit differently.
  • I’ve fought weight enough to see the truth and sense of this in my own life.  It’s like our body becomes immune to our efforts and we have to rethink how to trick it into doing what we want it to do all over again.

I realize none of this is earth shattering.  However, it was just what I needed today to get going again.  A hook to hang my hope on.  It helped me so I thought it might help you too. Who was it that said that the definition of insanity is to keep doing what we’ve always done and expect to get different results?   My two words for this week are…

Change Something !!

                                 

May1

Breakthrough

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Breakthrough

My loyal followers (bless you) know that I have dedicated this year of 2012 to breakthrough hurdles in three important areas of my life.   Those areas are    1. Technology phobia.   2.  Exercise     3.  Significant weight loss

All of these are areas in which I have had marginal success in the past.  However, significant breakthrough success has eluded me. First let me say I can tell that I have hit a nerve when I publish about this struggle.  Why?  Because on the last day of each month the ‘hits’ on my blog site jump way up whether I have published anything or not.  I know all of us struggle with particular issues that seem to beat us over and over again no matter what our initial commitment. I know you are rooting for me.

Some Good News

First let me talk about successes this month

    • My ebook and the print book version of Caregiving Elderly Parents have both been published and are available on Amazon.com.  Hooray!
    • Testimonials are starting to roll in.
    • My co-author, Marky Olson, and I are so proud of the way this book will help and encourage others.
    • This accomplishment required me to continually breakthrough my technology phobia.
    • I have learned about formatting for ebooks, blogging, rudiments of facebook, using drop box, attending webinars, using Search Engine Optimization, and countless other techie skills.
    • I’m very close to publishing my second book and ebook for teachers.

Breakdowns in Breakthroughs

I HATE to Admit this Publicly

But

Oh, how I am struggling in the other two areas of exercise and weight loss.  The worst news is that I have actually gained weight this month.  Yep.  There it is.  Right out there.  Why did I think this was a good idea to promise monthly updates?  Why did I want to make this battle so public when I have failed so many times before?  Temporary insanity is all I can figure.

My exercise commitment was also down this month.  In the past three months I was exercising a minimum of 20 times per month/5 days per week.  This month I only exercised 11 times.  Funny how that weight thing and that exercise thing go together.  No.  I don’t believe it is because exercise causes me to burn that many calories.  I think it’s more an issue of when one thing breaks down, I’m just so tempted to throw in the towel on both.  I have such an all-or-nothing personality.  I have fought that tendency all my life.

Back to Good News

Yep.  There is some good news.  I’m re-committing myself to my original breakthrough mentality.  I refuse to give in!

  • Yes!  It will be harder.
  • Yes, now I have to recover ground I’ve already lost.
  • BUT….and this is a big BUT….I know if I don’t do this now,  what the outcome will be.
  • I also know exactly why I gained weight.  It was no mystery.  I ate too much and the wrong things.
  • I either recommit right now or face long-term failure…again.  Unfortunately in the case of weight and exercise…this is a past habit I MUST breakthrough.
  • I’m asking you to hang in there with me for one more month.  Surely I’d be too embarrassed to admit another breakdown.
  • Pray.  Cheer.  Encourage.  Hope.  Cross your fingers.  Think positive thoughts.  Send me an encouraging comment. Please.
  • I REFUSE to let this beat me again.
  • REFUSE !
  • Someday I want to get an author’s photo taken to put on these books I’m writing.  (But not yet)
Feb29

Breakthrough Update

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February Progress

Woo-Hoo!

 Those of you who are my regular blog readers (thank you!) know that I’ve committed myself to making progress this year in three areas that have eluded ongoing success in the past.  In other words I’ve tried and failed many times.  But this year I want to breakthrough in these areas.  The areas are 1. exercise  2. eating reasonably to lose a significant number of pounds.  3. Understanding technology.

Best News First

  • I’m exercising regularly.  Honest to goodness I try to workout six times a week.
  • Very, very occasionally I have a time restraint that prohibits my working out at my exercise facility which may lower it to 5 days a week.
  • I’m actually enjoying the work outs.  !!
  • Goals this month: If I miss a work out I want to commit to exercising at home or by walking.  Spring is almost here.  Outside walks are now possible.
  • Some time this month I want to try to add in zumba.  This is offered where I work out.  I’ve avoided it because I’m just coming off an achilles tendonitis issue.  I will start cautiously.
  • This is the area in which I feel I’ve made the most progress.  I believe I am most apt to have made a permanent change in this area.
  • I feel like it is getting easier.

Positive Progress

  • I’ve lost weight this month.
  • I actually lost more than I thought I might when I made my prediction at the beginning of the month.  Yay!
  • However, all the weight I lost happened in the middle of the month.  Many pounds came off at once while hovering in the same spot for a while.
  • The past two weeks I’ve stalled in one spot.
  • As I hover I get more and more discouraged.  It is hard to keep eating a reduced amount for ten days of seeing no progress.  I find myself eating just a tiny bit more thinking, “What the heck!  It isn’t coming off anyway.”  😦
  • I believe I have cut back my food intake enough that my body is trying to hang on to weight.  My metabolism may be dropping off which is preventing additional weight loss.  I’ve reached this weight before and plateaued.
  • I am also gaining muscles which I’ve heard weigh more than…uh…fat.
  • With the turn of the month I feel a new commitment.  But after three months on this issue, I admit it is harder to get revved up.   Power boost needed.
  • I want this to be easier.  It isn’t.

Technology Progress

  • There is no doubt about it.  I’m making progress.
  • But many, many things still elude me.
  • Earlier this week while working on this blog, it posted twice prematurely.  I still have no idea why?
  • I attend webinars on technology issues but often feel like I learn nothing, because I don’t understand what they are saying.  At the end of each one I have to fight tears.  Therefore I skip webinars that are available to me.
  • In school, I always felt like I was ‘smart’ (whatever that means).  It is hard to feel ‘dumb’ (whatever that means) about an issue.  I want to run from it.
  •  There’s no doubt I’m making progress.  I’m now on facebook.  I have half my timeline designed.  It will be revealed tomorrow…without a photo.  Baby steps.
  • I don’t know how to link anything.  I can’t insert clips or videos.  It is  a steep learning curve.
  • I’m also writing two blogs which force me to learn new skills.
  • The ebook I’m co-authoring will be submitted the end of this week.  I still have to learn how to make a page of photos with captions by then.   Gulp.
  • It is an uphill struggle.
  • I somehow believe this area will always be a challenge for me.  I want it to be easier.  It isn’t.
 Next breakthrough update?   Coming at the end of March.
Jan10

Clutter Buster

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 Begin humming the theme to the old Ghost Busters movie as you read this post. 

If you aren’t old enough to remember it…well…sometimes it sucks to be young.  (But not often enough)

For most of the year clutter and I are best friends.   We comfortably cohabit.  A few books can share a couch with me.  A pile of papers can reside for a while on my kitchen counter next to where I cook.  A couple of pair of shoes can rest next to the dresser before being banished to the closet.

Even the vacuum cleaner is allowed to rest for a day or two in a sun filled room.  In fact, taking the vacuum cleaner out of the closet and parking it in the center of the room says to any unexpected guests who might drop by, “I know this room needs to be vacuumed.  I was just about to do so, when you stopped by.”  That’s what I tell myself anyway.

But a week or so ago I wrote my piece about 2012 becoming my breakthrough year.  Remember?  Lofty new lifestyles are being addressed.  I plan to eat reasonably forever while conquering my fears of technology simultaneously.  An exercise plan has been instituted.  For good.  These issues will no longer rule my life.  Period.  Keep a straight face here.

The problem is this gal can’t just eat reasonably without replacing that annoying habit with something.  It turns out giving up comfort food has to be replaced by activity.  My hands have to be doing something other than moving snacks to my lips every waking second.  One can only use the keyboard for a certain number of hours per day.  My eyes glanced around my house frantically for a substitute plan.  Bingo.

I have become a purging princess.  I’m digging through closets, sorting, and pitching.   Decades of clothes in a variety of sizes, ALL are being held up one at a time subjected to the same revealing  question.  Listen carefully to this question, because it is an important one. 

“If I ever get to be this size again, is this what I would want to wear?”

Do not think about how much the item cost.  (Sometimes I remember that).  Do not chastise yourself with how few times you have worn it.  That answer is cruel and unusual punishment so don’t go there.  Only one question really matters.  See above.  That, my friends, is a breakthrough question.

I have taken so many trips to drop off rejected items, people close to me are sure I’m having an affair with the Good Will man.  I haven’t stopped with clothes.  Yesterday I spent hours in the basement, going through all the tubs of Christmas decorations, digging all the way to the bottom to the items I haven’t used in years.  Gone!  I have a box of books to take to Half Price books.  And the trash man will have to work a good bit harder when he stops at my house this week.

But a girl’s gotta do, what a girl’s gotta do.  The food void must be replaced with something. I have become a clutter buster. More ghost buster music here, fading out.  da-da-da-da-dum.