Can I Do It?
Sooner or later it happens to all of us. We’re standing on one side of a ditch, or challenge, or life situation, and trying to imagine what it would be like to make the leap to the other side. The chasm looks too wide. The water looks too deep. The distance is daunting when we get up close. It was OK to dream about it, sure. But dreaming and doing aren’t the same. Doing is scary. As we flex to make the jump everything inside of us is screaming, “NO! You will fail.”
We may be dissatisfied with where we are in life, but the risk involved in change keeps us paralyzed. We may feel frustrated, but we feel a little bit safe also. This life is what I know! What if I leave this job and fail in my next job? I don’t like my current position, but it may be better to stay put than to move to a new organization and lose all my seniority. This marriage isn’t satisfying but what if I never find anyone else to love? What if no one else ever loves me? I’d like to enter a writing contest, but what makes me think I could possibly win? Rejection may hurt too much and I’ll stop writing altogether.
“I’m afraid of failure. I’m afraid I’ll feel humiliated. I’m afraid I can’t support myself or my family.” We say it all. Blah, blah, de blah, blah, blah.
The Good News
Here’s the thing you never learn until you take the leap. Standing between two choices is incredibly hard. You are using double the energy it would take to commit to one. Half of your psyche is committed to one outcome. The other half of you is pleading with yourself to make the change. That mental dichotomy is absolutely exhausting. Everything in your life seems twice as hard and half as satisfying. As soon as you make the leap, even if you completely wipe out, things get easier. You can turn your entire focus toward making your new venture a success. Your chances of succeeding in your new choice explode forward. You find out you CAN do it after all. It was only your doubt holding you back.
The Bad News
Most people are like this cow.
So who are you?
The cow or the surfer?
Only you can make the choice.
Hi. My name is Dauna; and I am a listaholic. I make lists to organize my days. That’s what I tell the world. Frequently, however, I get carried away. I’ve been known to write two or three things I’ve already done that day on the top of my list because I want “credit for them.” Scrapbookers, who plan their vacations around the photo opportunities their destinations will provide, will understand this point of view. It’s a disease.
I love scratching things off my list after I complete them. It makes me feel powerful, valuable, and efficient… like Wonder Woman with a pen and a much bigger costume.
“What did you do today, honey?”
“Look, here’s my list. See how looooong it is.”
Any time there is an article in a magazine about making lists I read it. Let’s be honest, I could write these articles. I can visualize the list of bullets I could include in my article. It would be a beautiful list about making lists. One wonderful suggestion they always write in these articles is to do the thing you dread the most, FIRST. Great advice, but hard to execute.
For the past three days I have had the same most dreaded item (make a call about my health benefits) on my list. Do you know how upsetting it is to have the same top dread on my list for three days in a row? Paralyzing. Failure is having everything crossed off your list at the end of the day while the one most distasteful item glares back at you. Each day it peers back at you the stress builds. It’s enough to give a listaholic nightmares.
I’m proud to announce I called about my health benefits today. Ahhh. What a relief. (There’s a reason I didn’t write this article yesterday). Tomorrow my list will be fresh. No festering reruns. That is really fortunate because with Thanksgiving only a week away my lists seem to be consuming steroids while I’m not looking.
But my conscience won’t be clear until I make one more confession. What I’m writing now is my blog for tomorrow. I will save it overnight. When I get up tomorrow the first thing on my list will be “Write and post blog entry.” I’ll hit one button and then cross it immediately off my list. Tomorrow is going to be a great day.